I Won!

This is a story from many years ago - but is so interesting/funny that it simply needs to be shared again. This type situation could happen to any of us, and I'll bet many of you have put yourself in this predicament before. Marty is no longer a member of NMCA, but you can see him and his magnificent award winning '72 at assorted car shows throughout the year.

Marty Zimberoff has had many "banner" days during his adulthood. Landing a big account, achieving a special goal or just enjoying some of the finer things in life. Marty certainly deserves a banner day, as we all do from time to time. For those who don't know Marty very well, allow me to say that Marty is an individual who thinks outside-the-box and goes for the gusto when he sees an opportunity. Being a true Corvette lover, and owning a few very special Corvettes that always seem to snag trophies when displayed, attending the 50th anniversary celebration in Nashville was pretty much a given. Not much gets by Marty, and as everyone else had their eyes on the Corvettes, Marty was busy scoping out the huge assortment of display pieces, signs and banners. Apparently there were two banners that made an impression on Marty. The 15'-20' banners that hung from light poles and displayed celebratory messages. But that's not what interested Marty.

Then there were the 4 really big banners that hung from Titan stadium. The photo above does really show the full scope of these banners, but you get the overall impression that this isn't some run-of-the-mill backyard banner. The banner actually measures 30 feet wide by 80 feet tall. (hanging to right against building in picture)

So impressed was Marty, that upon returning home, that he surfed the web and found that Chevrolet was auctioning off many of these celebration banners. Not one to be left behind, Marty promptly submitted auction bids on all banners available, large and small. Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. Out of sight, out of mind. That is, until early May when an unusual e-mail arrived in Marty's inbox. "Congratulations" it read . . . you have secured the winning bid for a 50th anniversary Corvette banner. Well, that's cool he thought. Reading further, the message went on to describe his acquisition as being the large banner which he had been dwarfed by outside of Titan stadium. Cool again he thought, although, he actually wanted the smaller banner. A few days pass and the reality begins to sink in. He scans the e-mail a few more times and realizes that this sucker is 30 feet wide. The banner is to be delivered in a moving van! This is not a piece of cheesecloth, but instead a heavy gauge material which he now remembers being strung up by some heavy duty ropes usually reserved for Naval ships! How much is this thing going to weigh? Where do I have a space that's 30 feet long to store this thing? Where can I possibly ever use this monster. And most importantly, when do I tell my wife what I've just bought? All of a sudden this once in a lifetime opportunity has become a once-in-a-lifetime headache. During the May 15th bar-b-q at Luis & Lisa's home following a day long caravan, someone asks Marty how things are going. Robin looks at Marty, cracks a smile, and simply says, "Go ahead Marty, tell'em what you bought!" Marty sports his usual smile and sneaks in a little blurb about how he's the proud owner of some memorabilia from the previous year in Nashville. He describes his bid, the banner and quickly skims over the dimensions. A few minutes later everyone at the table arrives at the same conclusion, that this banner is absolutely gigantic in size. Marty smiles and then begins a very innocent plea for suggestions on what to do with this creation. Robin has a laugh that is somewhere between "you're funny" and "I can't believe what you've done!" After many wild, and not-so-wild ideas were kicked around, everyone at the table said they'd think on the matter. Meanwhile, a truck was out there somewhere, steaming towards Albuquerque with a 2,400 square foot piece of burlap! Now, Marty lives in a regular house….nice, but regular. His garage is like most, and does not measure 30 feet deep. It's anyone's guess how massive this roll is in diameter, but for a visual, go to a warehouse for carpet and scope out a full sized roll. Now….imagine that in your house…..somewhere.

Congratulations Marty on your winning bid. Perhaps this will teach you not to stay up late and mess around on the computer when your credit card is in the same room. I still think it's cool that a NMCA member is the proud recipient, but I fear we may all be pressed into action to lift this bad boy at some point. Maybe this can replace the "Person Of The Year" trophy with this rolled up piece of history, and we can each have a shot at ownership! Yep, leave it to Marty to redefine the meaning of a "banner day"! (Hey, are those people way down there!) And for what it's worth, this enormous banner remains in Marty's garage taking up who knows how much space!

Source: Phil Ellison

Posted 9/13/19